So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Randomize