umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize