i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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