Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize