You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize