it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
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