Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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