Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize