That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
My cat gives me a boner
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Randomize
