went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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