i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
