found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
