It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
either way he was missing a nipple.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Can you bring me the toilet please
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
I had to cum in my sink.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize