You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
