Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
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