I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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