The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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