I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
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