i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Randomize