She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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