I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Randomize
