I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
now i know why i became what i already was.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Randomize
