Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
