Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
