So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Randomize
