Do you still have your period?
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize
