sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
