She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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