are you still at the devil's house?
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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