evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
grandma shit on top of the toilet
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
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