When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
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