i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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