Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Randomize
