$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
I wish you could order shots online.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
