I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
