Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
either way he was missing a nipple.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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