I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Randomize
