I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
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