ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
