idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Randomize
