it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Randomize