I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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