I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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