I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
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