i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
