new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
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