Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
