We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
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