Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Randomize
