I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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