so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I use my feet as sexual weapons
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
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