Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
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